


if i should not return (fare thee well, my own true love)

by alittlelesssixteencandles



Series: codywan oneshots [1]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: CC-2224 | Cody Needs a Hug, CT-5597 | Jesse Can't Cook, Felucia (Star Wars), Light Angst, M/M, Standing in the rain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24460171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alittlelesssixteencandles/pseuds/alittlelesssixteencandles
Summary: Cody can’t explain what he feels. The Felucian rain feels good on his skin, after days of being trapped within the recycled air of his helmet’s confines. He wonders how long he’s been standing under it, likely long enough to warrant another reprimand on the dangers of losing yourself even on downtime, and the foreign microbes- he laughs, in spite of himself, for the first time months. He doesn’t know when he started crying, and when the tears blended into the water pouring on his face, and it’s confusing because he’s not sad. Cody isn’t sad. He can’t be. He’s not made like that. None of us are made like that. So why does everything hurt? Still, he can’t break the void trance that he’s sunk himself into, even with the vague awareness of someone calling his name from the shelter of an AT-TE.
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex, CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi
Series: codywan oneshots [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1783699
Comments: 6
Kudos: 129





	if i should not return (fare thee well, my own true love)

**Author's Note:**

> oh come ye back  
> my own true love  
> and stay a while with me  
> if i had a friend—  
> on this earth
> 
> you've been a friend to me.

Cody can’t explain what he feels. The Felucian rain feels good on his skin, after days of being trapped within the recycled air of his helmet’s confines. He wonders how long he’s been standing under it, _likely long enough to warrant another reprimand on the dangers of losing yourself even on downtime, and_ _the_ _foreign_ _microbes_ \- he laughs, in spite of himself, for the first time months. He doesn’t know when he started crying, and when the tears blended into the water pouring on his face, and it’s confusing because he’s not _sad_. Cody isn’t sad. _He can’t be. He’s not made like that. None of us are_ made _like_ that _._ So why does everything hurt? Still, he can’t break the void trance that he’s sunk himself into, even with the vague awareness of someone calling his name from the shelter of an AT-TE. 

It isn’t until a hand clamps firmly on his shoulder that his mind snaps back into reality, and he turns. The corner of Rex’s mouth teases a sporadic grin as he talks, tone heavy with a half-hearted drawl almost as if the very task of speaking bores him. “You just gonna stand here all night, _vod_?” He admonishes, bemused, as he watches the sleet cascade down the commander’s face. Cody blinks slowly.

“Was thinkin’ about it.”

Rex doesn’t reply as Cody cranes his neck backward. The quiet sibilation of the captain’s helmet unsealing sounds. He lets out a grunt. “This’s kriffing _cold_.”

“You get used to it.” Cody hums. His eyes are closed, now. A beat passes before he breaks the silence. “ _Me’bana_?”

“You first.”

“ _Rex_.”

Rex sighs. “He’s… still out. And you’re practically _waterboarding_ yourself.” He adds, and his nose wrinkles in scrutiny. “You’ll get hypothermia. Then Kix will kill me for letting it happen.”

Cody grimaces. “That your way of saying you’re worried?”

“Is this _your_ way of saying _you’re_ worried?”

“Don’t turn my words against me.” Cody deadpans, opening his eyes and returning his gaze to the man beside him. “I was _bored_. And I haven’t had a shower in…” he trails, tapping his fingers against his leg. Rex stares at him with unadulterated disbelief. “…Sixteen days.”

“He’ll be okay.” Rex replies, voice dropping. Cody’s hand curls into a fist. “You know that, right?”

“I’m _not_ worried.”

“Yeah, and I’m not going to forcefully drag your _shebs_ out of this.” The captain retorts, jabbing a finger toward the overcast skies above. “You can’t fucking _shut down_.” Cody’s shoulders fall. The hardness dissipates from Rex’s features in an instant, and he gently grabs a hold of his companion’s wrist and gives it a light tug. “C’mon.”

Cody lets himself be pulled out of the rain and pushed under the tarp that hangs below the walker. Warmth, and the stale odour of ozone clogged with _whatever the hell one of the troopers is brewing in a bucket_ \- engulfs him. He nearly gags, which draws out a sharp bark of laughter from Jesse, the culprit and self-proclaimed cook. Someone hands him a bowl of the food, _if you can even call it tha_ t, and he _swears_ he can see something crawling in it. Rex doesn’t seem fazed, however, and the man has the notorious reputation for being the 501st’s pickiest eater _(partly the fault of General Skywalker)_ , so Cody forces himself to choke down a spoonful of the stuff and sits on the dirt with his brothers around a small heat lamp. His gaze wanders to another tarp that partitions the troops from the wounded. _It’s quiet_ , he notes. _Too quiet_. Rex nudges him in the side with his elbow and sends him a look that conveys what words can’t, somewhere between _everything’s okay_ and _everything’s definitely_ not _okay, but we’re in this together._

_He’s in there_. Cody pushes the intrusive thought away and swallows the lump that has clawed its way up his throat.

“You can go see him, you know.” Rex whispers, low enough so that the others can’t hear. Cody shakes his head.

“Doesn’t do anyone any good.”

“How do you know?” Comes Rex’s response, even quieter, like he’d said it to himself.

It takes a moment for Cody to finally sigh and set his bowl on the ground before moving to his feet. He ignores how all conversation stands still as he pushes the tarp aside, letting it sway back into place once he’s past it. He’s promptly greeted with the sight of his injured _vod’e,_ torn between restlessness and the effects of whatever drug Kix had administered. The medic turns as he enters, staring at him with an unreadable expression, until he mumbles something unintelligible along the lines of _‘get to work or get out’._ He throws a sealed package of bacta at his commander and points toward a trooper, _one of the shinies_ Cody realizes, trying to push down the swell of guilt as he kneels to change the bacta plastered to her collarbone. She lets out a strangled whine when he peels it back, and Cody quickly begins to mop up the blood that leaks from the open wound with the gauze that Kix shoves into his hands. The medic lets out a curse when he sees the injury’s state, and kneels beside Cody to tear open the bacta package with his teeth before slapping the strip unceremoniously over the gash. That draws out a startled shout from the trooper. Kix winces.

“Sorry, kid.”

“ _Kark_.” She seethes, finally prying her eyes open to shoot a vehement glare at the medic, who pats her head in a somewhat-soothing gesture. Cody falls back on his heels, which warrants a concerned glance.

“When was the last time you ate?”

The commander looks up with a raised brow. “Two minutes ago.”

“Slept?”

“ _Kix_.”

“ _Commander_.”

“I’m fine.”

“We _need_ you, sir. _Gar shuk meh kyrayc_.” Kix retorts, glaring at him pointedly, as if that settles it. Cody huffs and slowly crawls off the ground- again, trying not to mind his aching muscles. Kix falters. “The general’s over there. He’s stable, for now, but I… don’t know for how long.” Cody twists. The Jedi- _his_ _Jetii_ , a voice reminds him, and he can’t find the heart to deny it- looks on the brink of death. Yet… Cody still can’t shake the odd feeling in his chest. Even with bandages swathing the blaster wounds on his arms, and his face and hair covered in dried blood, he’s… 

_Shut it down, Cody._

“What happened to the medivac?” He whispers. Kix scowls.

“Flak’s too heavy.” _The evac was shot down_.

“Skywalker?”

“Last I heard he was trying to cut a path through to us. That was…” he pauses, grabbing his helmet off of a crate to peer at the HUD. “A little over two hours ago.”

Cody clenches his jaw. “I don’t suppose if I yell at him he’ll wake up.” He states, to which Kix lets out a bitter laugh in return.

“You can try, but I doubt it’ll work.” Cody draws in a deep breath and moves to Kenobi’s side, once again dropping to the dirt heavily. “I won’t kick you out.” Kix continues, softly. Cody makes eye contact with Rex through the gap between the partition.

_“Ni suvarir, ner’vod_.”

**Author's Note:**

> i might add more to this in the future, but i wrote it for a warm-up and fell in love :'>
> 
> MANDO'A  
> Vod - brother/sister/sibling  
> Vod'e - vod plural form  
> Gar shuk meh kyrayc - you're no good dead/you're no use to me dead  
> Ni suvarir - i know  
> Ner’vod - younger brother/sister/sibling


End file.
